Sensual vs. Sexual: What’s the Difference

Sexuality and sensuality have rather a lot in frequent — however they’re not the identical factor. What is the distinction between being sexual and being sensual, and the way do the 2 relate to one another?

“Sexual” is fairly simple: When individuals speak about sexual exercise, they’re normally referring to the method of bodily intimacy between consenting adults. Sometimes, although, the thought of being “sensual” is lumped in with being sexual.

“I think people often use ‘sensual’ when trying to say [or imply] ‘sexual-light,’ when it would be so much more helpful to remember that ‘sensual’ simply means ‘of the senses’– sight, smell, sound, taste, and touch,” says Richard M. Siegel, PhD, a licensed psychological well being counselor and co-director of Modern Sex Therapy Institutes in West Palm Beach, FL.

In different phrases, being sexual just about at all times includes being sensual — may you might have intercourse with out partaking any of your 5 senses? But being sensual doesn’t must contain being sexual. It’s a lot greater than that.

You can select to faucet into your sensual self as a part of a sexual encounter, as a part of an intimate encounter that isn’t essentially going to result in intercourse, or simply as a result of it feels good with no considered something sexual in any respect.

“Sensuality is the basis of how we experience our bodies, other bodies, and the world around us,” says Rosara Torrisi, PhD, a licensed intercourse therapist, founding director of The Long Island Institute of Sex Therapy, and co-host of the podcast Our Better Half about sexuality and older adults. “What I do a lot as a sex therapist is help people with their sensual self.”

“Sensuality is a way to positively inhabit the body, through pleasure and joy and fun and celebration,” she provides. “Enjoying your body can be a revolutionary act when you are not objectified or subjected to another person, and you own your pleasure and your time.”

Reconnecting With Your Sensual Self

So how will you get again in contact along with your sensual self — whether or not or not you need that sensuality to finally result in sexuality? Start by going again to fundamentals.

“Think about what feels good to your sense of touch,” Torrisi says. “What do you like to smell? What tastes good to you? What music or other sounds do you like to listen to? What do you like to look at? Mindfulness is the crux of it. It’s about noticing what’s happening with your senses and having fun in your body.”

Some concepts to discover:

Joyful physique motion. This could be dance, yoga, stretching, occurring walks, leaping up and down, or taking part in the piano or one other instrument. What are the bodily sensations?

Look for magnificence in your on a regular basis world. Maybe it’s flowers in a backyard, or a spectacular sundown, or artwork. What do you see that’s visually pleasurable?

Make a meal. It doesn’t must be a elaborate gourmand dinner. Even making a easy spaghetti sauce can gentle up your senses of odor and style. Notice the scent of the onions, garlic, and spices. Taste the tomato sauce. Linger with the aromas in your kitchen.

Tap into contact. Notice how totally different materials and textures like furs, feathers, wool, or suede really feel.

“Try different touches, textures, scents and use them to become more aware of your body in general,” Torrisi says. Remember, that is nearly noticing what feels good to you. It doesn’t must result in anything.

“Sensuality is for everyone, whether you’re single, with a partner, with multiple partners, or never engaged in sexual connection at all,” Torrisi says. “Maybe your ultimate sensual pleasure is wearing cozy pajamas, sipping a cup of tea in a quiet house, and blissing out looking at your backyard. That’s sensuality too. It’s a way to positively inhabit your body.”

How Sensuality Can Improve Sexuality

Although sexuality and sensuality don’t must go collectively, they actually can. And generally refocusing on the sensual can enhance the sexual side of your life — particularly when the physique has bodily limitations.

Sexuality educator Jane Fleishman, PhD, focuses on the sexual well-being of older adults in senior residing communities. “They often have to redefine what sex means as their bodies age and think more about sensuality as another form of pleasure,” she says. “Arousal of sensuality may lead to a sexual interaction … or it might just be exactly what we’re looking for in itself.”

If you might have a accomplice, you may resolve collectively to get in contact along with your sensual selves for the needs of want and arousal, Fleishman says.

For occasion, she factors to the sensual pleasure of dancing to music with the best lighting and ambiance. “Or try ‘body mapping’– touching every part of your body to rediscover what feels good and what doesn’t,” Fleishman says. “With couples who’ve been together for a long time and for whom sex has not been good or has not been happening at all, this kind of sensual touch is a great way to reconnect.”